Ada and Darcy

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Every now and again a question comes up that just cannot be ignored. Not being one to shy away from the big issues, I wanted to bring up one of those questions with you today.

The question I seek answers to is “Since when is small such a bad thing?”

I’m not talking about height, IQ, penis size, or anything personal like that, I’m talking about things we purchase. With the possible exception of clothes, it seems to be everywhere…

Consider this, when was the last time you purchased a small fries, or drink at a fast food outlet? The 80’s maybe?

You cannot buy a small size anything at a fast food outlet anymore, they are all called “regular” servings now. Why is this? I always thought that regular would mean average, and therefore more of a medium size. Other than that, I thought regular was something  that you became after eating a lot of bran for breakfast.

Do these people think we are all pigs? Even a child needs a regular serving, rather than small?

I understand that these companies probably want to create the impression that they are not scabby with their servings, therefore it was a more than likely a marketing department decision.

However, I also think the sales department missed that email. The sales whiz’s at fast food outlets are all about the upsell, the “would you like fries with that?” approach. They always ask if you want to upsize. Call me strange, but I would have thought it was easier to upsize someone from a small meal, rather than a regular one, but hey, what would I know…?

Chickens seem to have adapted themselves to suit our needs also. Chickens now come in 3 sizes, large, extra large, and family. How clever are they? They must have come before the egg…

It’s not just food either. Small cars have already started being referred to as compact cars, just like a small truck is called a pickup truck.

A real estate agent won’t refer to a house, or apartment as small either. A small house might referred to as being quaint, and a small apartment is called a studio apartment these days.

The only thing I have heard refered to as “small” recently is logic. I heard the word “Small” used when somebody was trying to explain the amount of logic in a coalition policy…. I actually think they used the term “small minded” also.

Anyway, it has now started to creep into clothing it seems. Most clothes come in sizes, which are numbered, however there are also extra small, small, medium, large, and extra large sizes. However, a new size has been gathering momentum of late, it’s called petite, and it is replacing extra small by the looks of things.

So what? You may well ask.

Well, my fear is this. If the trend to rename the small size regular moves to clothing, then the 8-10 size will be called regular.

Think about it…

This would do more damage to female self esteem levels than a thousand anorexic and airbrushed Cleo and Cosmo models.

If you are female, and are a size 12 or above, are you going to be happy in a size larger than regular? Any guys smiling at this,  imagine going shopping with your wife or girlfriend and she discovers when buying a pair of jeans that she needs to upsize from a regular.

Hell would be looking rather pleasant at that point. Terrorists would start becoming designers. There would be riots at every shopping mall.

This madness has to stop before it’s too late. Soon enough, our food outlets will only cater for pigs, and our clothing outlets will base their size names on bolemic’s.

Something’s gotta give…..

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5 thoughts on “A Time To Be Small

  1. We have petite in the US, just means it’s for short chicks so our pants aren’t so long 🙂 Well written sir!

  2. Thanks 🙂
    Yes you need jeans the right length, otherwise people will think they’re Bell Bottoms…. 🙂

  3. Ahhhh, can I phone a friend, or go a 50/50? Imperial to me may as well be speaking Chinese…. 🙂

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